Does any one else think that printers were invented by Satan to be the downfall of humankind? I hate printers. I don't think once in my life, ever, have I not had problems with our printer.
Today's scourge: I need some graph paper for Nathan to do his Math. Let me run upstairs and print some off. Googled it, found it in less than a minute. Push print, and.............. "Carriage Jam. Clear carriage jam. Press OK."
OK.
Grind. Think. Spin.
"Carriage Jam. Clear carriage jam. Press OK."
Open door to verify it is not jammed.
OK.
"Carriage Jam. Clear carriage jam. Press OK."
OK.
"Carriage Jam. Clear carriage jam. Press OK."
OK.
Unplug to reset.
Grind. Think. Spin.
Everything is acting okay! Push print.........
GAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So a 2-minute interruption for school turns into a 30 minute fight with technology. And we skip the graph. Again.
Is there any printer that doesn't do this sort of thing? Or is it just my unfortunate bad luck?
This one's specialty is running out of ink halfway through a document, so you have the last 3 pages of something you can't even read. Then it will pop up with a message, "Ink Running Low." Ya think?? And it loves to pull that on sheet music that I've downloaded and am only allowed one printing.
Showing posts with label Rants. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Rants. Show all posts
Monday, November 17, 2014
Tuesday, November 11, 2014
Too Many Clothes!
Am I the only one that struggles with this? I have SO MANY CLOTHES!!!!
We have (had) only 4 closets in our entire house. (And only two of those were original to the house.) One upstairs, a shared closet between the bedrooms (that we use as an attic), and three on the main floor, in our bedroom. One of those was our hanging-clothes closet, and the other was a multi-purpose storage closet (with photo albums, games, sewing/crafts), etc. The last closet we repurposed into a headboard area for our bed, to gain space in our room. When we built the basement, our hanging clothes closet disappeared to make room for the stairway.
Knowing we were going to be down two closets by the end of summer, I did a HUGE clothes purge this spring for our annual garage sale But I STILL have a 4-drawer dresser stuffed completely full, a 3-foot "portable" wardrobe (also full), two extra drawers in a Rubbermaid dresser full of socks and underthings, a shelf-full of sweaters, and an under-bed box of off-season clothes. AND I DON'T SHOP FOR CLOTHES!!!!!
It's seriously a dilemma for me. I feel like I can't get rid of clothes, because they are either 1/stained and/or frayed enough that no one would want to buy them at Goodwill or a garage sale, or 2/still practically brand new so I feel like I haven't gotten my (or more often, someone else's) money out of them. (A lot of my clothing has been gifts. People must think I need help in the fashion department.)
So what do I do? Keep wearing the "every day" things I have been wearing (paint-stained exercise pants and promotional t-shirts) until they fall apart, or wear my nicer shirts and sweaters so I can feel that I look nice and am getting the worth out of an article of clothing, even though they very well may get ruined in the course of the day?
For now, I'll go back and do the THIRD major clothing purge of the year. If I don't love it and haven't worn it in a year, it's going.
Friday, September 12, 2014
Quote to Consider:
If He [God] were small enough to be understood, He wouldn't be big enough to be worshiped.
-David Jeremiah
"I Don't Know and That's Okay"
from the September 2014 issue of Turning Points Magazine and Devotional
-David Jeremiah
"I Don't Know and That's Okay"
from the September 2014 issue of Turning Points Magazine and Devotional
Friday, September 5, 2014
Home Improvements 2014: A big STEP
It's been over 8 weeks. Time has flown. Progress went really well, boom-boom-boom, for the first 5 weeks, and then pretty much came to a standstill for two weeks, waiting for the plumber to lay the drains so they could pour the floor. That was really, really frustrating.
But they poured the floor last week, and today was a big STEP toward getting finished..... STAIRS!
The workers told Paul these aren't the final stairs, but they are what they will use to access the basement to finish the HVAC, plumbing, and electrical. They have been accessing it through a ladder in the window well (identical to the one in the background). Everything has been coming through that window.... Lumber, beams, pipes, cinder blocks....
Next week they will start on the back porch. So close! And then comes the decisions I will lose sleep on. Not even kidding. Putting color on the floors and walls will be the things that will completely STRESS ME OUT. But right now I'm saying - BRING IT ON! I would gladly take losing sleep over color swatches and flooring samples, over having my home completely torn up. I am so ready!
Thursday, August 7, 2014
Discrimination
I believe I've ranted about boot shopping before.
But may I just say that I think it's discrimination, the fact that women's shoes come in half sizes, until you get to size 11, and then it's whole sizes. Because apparently when you have a larger foot, you quit caring about whether your shoes fit just right. Grr.
I am borrowing a pair of boots from my sister for the Horses, Boots, & Bibles kids' day camp. The soles on mine have completely disintegrated. I really like hers, but they're a tad snug. But if the next option is a whole size larger, I'll be slopping around in them.
As it turns out, there's a bootsmith in a nearby city. Getting my old (men's, I might add) boots re-soled will be less than half of buying a new pair, so that's what I'll go with. :)
But may I just say that I think it's discrimination, the fact that women's shoes come in half sizes, until you get to size 11, and then it's whole sizes. Because apparently when you have a larger foot, you quit caring about whether your shoes fit just right. Grr.
I am borrowing a pair of boots from my sister for the Horses, Boots, & Bibles kids' day camp. The soles on mine have completely disintegrated. I really like hers, but they're a tad snug. But if the next option is a whole size larger, I'll be slopping around in them.
As it turns out, there's a bootsmith in a nearby city. Getting my old (men's, I might add) boots re-soled will be less than half of buying a new pair, so that's what I'll go with. :)
Monday, May 19, 2014
The Homeschool Pool
As you are all aware by now, we homeschool, and I have some pretty strong opinions about why we do it.
A while back I read a blog by a dad who was responding to a reader who argued against homeschooling. I don't know anything about this author, but one analogy of his article stuck with me.
Anyhow. I just thought this analogy perfectly summed up my thoughts on why we are homeschooling, and that maybe you all would enjoy it as well.
(You can find the whole article here: The Matt Walsh Blog: "Behold: the two absolutely worst arguments against homeschooling")
A while back I read a blog by a dad who was responding to a reader who argued against homeschooling. I don't know anything about this author, but one analogy of his article stuck with me.
You say that homeschooled kids aren’t properly socialized.
I give you this: with the exception of about 14 thousand other times, this is the first time I’ve ever heard this argument.
It’s an argument that seems to march on, even after its been disproven, discredited, deconstructed, and decapitated. I just promised to stop tossing around studies, so I won’t link to an article (here) that cites at least two different studies proving your assertion to be a myth.
I’ll only say that you chose a pretty strange analogy to prove your point. You can’t teach a child to swim without bringing him to a pool? I agree. But do you bring a child to the pool, drop him there with a thousand other kids, then come back 6 hours later, and repeat that process every day, five days a week, for the next 12 to 13 years? Or do you bring him to the pool, hang out with him, maybe even get in the water and play some Marco Polo, and then leave with him after a couple of hours?
I can tell you this: if you decide to just abandon your kid at the pool for hours and hours and hours on end, every day, for over a decade, he probably won’t do a lot of swimming. If he doesn’t drown (drowning is a very real possibility, especially if there’s only one lifeguard for every 40 kids), he’ll likely spend more time playing on his iPhone and smoking pot in the bathroom than learning the backstroke.
You say that homeschooled kids aren’t properly socialized.
I give you this: with the exception of about 14 thousand other times, this is the first time I’ve ever heard this argument.
It’s an argument that seems to march on, even after its been disproven, discredited, deconstructed, and decapitated. I just promised to stop tossing around studies, so I won’t link to an article (here) that cites at least two different studies proving your assertion to be a myth.
I’ll only say that you chose a pretty strange analogy to prove your point. You can’t teach a child to swim without bringing him to a pool? I agree. But do you bring a child to the pool, drop him there with a thousand other kids, then come back 6 hours later, and repeat that process every day, five days a week, for the next 12 to 13 years? Or do you bring him to the pool, hang out with him, maybe even get in the water and play some Marco Polo, and then leave with him after a couple of hours?
I can tell you this: if you decide to just abandon your kid at the pool for hours and hours and hours on end, every day, for over a decade, he probably won’t do a lot of swimming. If he doesn’t drown (drowning is a very real possibility, especially if there’s only one lifeguard for every 40 kids), he’ll likely spend more time playing on his iPhone and smoking pot in the bathroom than learning the backstroke.
Read more at http://themattwalshblog.com/2014/04/25/behold-the-two-absolutely-worst-arguments-against-homeschooling/#LMESHKTGof8crw0B.99
I give you this: with the exception of about 14 thousand other times, this is the first time I’ve ever heard this argument.
It’s an argument that seems to march on, even after its been disproven, discredited, deconstructed, and decapitated. I just promised to stop tossing around studies, so I won’t link to an article (here) that cites at least two different studies proving your assertion to be a myth.
I’ll only say that you chose a pretty strange analogy to prove your point. You can’t teach a child to swim without bringing him to a pool? I agree. But do you bring a child to the pool, drop him there with a thousand other kids, then come back 6 hours later, and repeat that process every day, five days a week, for the next 12 to 13 years? Or do you bring him to the pool, hang out with him, maybe even get in the water and play some Marco Polo, and then leave with him after a couple of hours?
I can tell you this: if you decide to just abandon your kid at the pool for hours and hours and hours on end, every day, for over a decade, he probably won’t do a lot of swimming. If he doesn’t drown (drowning is a very real possibility, especially if there’s only one lifeguard for every 40 kids), he’ll likely spend more time playing on his iPhone and smoking pot in the bathroom than learning the backstroke.
Read more at http://themattwalshblog.com/2014/04/25/behold-the-two-absolutely-worst-arguments-against-homeschooling/#LMESHKTGof8crw0B.99
You say that homeschooled kids aren’t properly socialized.
I give you this: with the exception of about 14 thousand other times, this is the first time I’ve ever heard this argument.
It’s an argument that seems to march on, even after its been disproven, discredited, deconstructed, and decapitated. I just promised to stop tossing around studies, so I won’t link to an article (here) that cites at least two different studies proving your assertion to be a myth.
I’ll only say that you chose a pretty strange analogy to prove your point. You can’t teach a child to swim without bringing him to a pool? I agree. But do you bring a child to the pool, drop him there with a thousand other kids, then come back 6 hours later, and repeat that process every day, five days a week, for the next 12 to 13 years? Or do you bring him to the pool, hang out with him, maybe even get in the water and play some Marco Polo, and then leave with him after a couple of hours?
I can tell you this: if you decide to just abandon your kid at the pool for hours and hours and hours on end, every day, for over a decade, he probably won’t do a lot of swimming. If he doesn’t drown (drowning is a very real possibility, especially if there’s only one lifeguard for every 40 kids), he’ll likely spend more time playing on his iPhone and smoking pot in the bathroom than learning the backstroke.
Read more at http://themattwalshblog.com/2014/04/25/behold-the-two-absolutely-worst-arguments-against-homeschooling/#LMESHKTGof8crw0B.99
I think he could have been just a bit more respectful in his response, although I understand when defenses go up about something you're passionate about.I give you this: with the exception of about 14 thousand other times, this is the first time I’ve ever heard this argument.
It’s an argument that seems to march on, even after its been disproven, discredited, deconstructed, and decapitated. I just promised to stop tossing around studies, so I won’t link to an article (here) that cites at least two different studies proving your assertion to be a myth.
I’ll only say that you chose a pretty strange analogy to prove your point. You can’t teach a child to swim without bringing him to a pool? I agree. But do you bring a child to the pool, drop him there with a thousand other kids, then come back 6 hours later, and repeat that process every day, five days a week, for the next 12 to 13 years? Or do you bring him to the pool, hang out with him, maybe even get in the water and play some Marco Polo, and then leave with him after a couple of hours?
I can tell you this: if you decide to just abandon your kid at the pool for hours and hours and hours on end, every day, for over a decade, he probably won’t do a lot of swimming. If he doesn’t drown (drowning is a very real possibility, especially if there’s only one lifeguard for every 40 kids), he’ll likely spend more time playing on his iPhone and smoking pot in the bathroom than learning the backstroke.
Read more at http://themattwalshblog.com/2014/04/25/behold-the-two-absolutely-worst-arguments-against-homeschooling/#LMESHKTGof8crw0B.99
Anyhow. I just thought this analogy perfectly summed up my thoughts on why we are homeschooling, and that maybe you all would enjoy it as well.
(You can find the whole article here: The Matt Walsh Blog: "Behold: the two absolutely worst arguments against homeschooling")
Wednesday, April 9, 2014
I Ditched Facebook: One Year Later
As some of you know, I ditched my Facebook account a year ago. (Last Friday was the "anniversary.")
I didn't make a big deal about it, because of two reasons, 1/I didn't want it to come off as "holier than thou" and 2/Paul got a Facebook account, so I still have access to Facebook.
Why would someone get rid of the best way to connect with their friends?
Because I wasn't connecting with my friends. I realized how many times I was saying in conversation, "I saw that on Facebook." Ugh. Do I not actually talk to my friends anymore? When did internet interaction replace face-to-face conversation? I knew everything about someone, without having ever talked to them.
There were other things.
The fake. Don't get me wrong, I try to put my best face forward in public. But to talk one way on FB, and the other face-to-face, made me wonder which was the true story.
The drama. I hate vague posts. Seriously. Just put it out there, quit trying to drum up reactions.
The gossip! Seriously - when you post crap like that, you're begging to be talked about behind your back! And I got tired of people talking about me behind my back, about who I chose to be friends with and how I interacted with them.
The complete, absolute time suck. Since it's so easy to "share" - it's so easy to lose track of the time while you're reading all those articles, blogs, recipes, etc. But I got to thinking: are these really making my life better? Not really. Not so much as the time I was ignoring my kids and housework was making my life worse. (Even when I get on Paul's Facebook to stalk him or my siblings, I could easily spend an hour on it, just by reading articles that his friends post!) My friends are not more important than my children. I refused any longer to ignore them to get my "I just need Mommy time" fix on social media.
What it did to my mind. I am a person who obsesses. I would get myself completely worked up about things I posted. I would post something completely honest, and true to my beliefs, that maybe goes against the social norm. But then I would worry so much about who I might have offended. But what good is a public platform if you can't take a stand? Or I would work myself up about what others posted. Or who was seeing my interaction with other friends. (Yes, I'm friends with that person. But this other person hates him/her. What if the "hater" saw what I posted on the other's wall? Why can't we all just get along????) My brain can't handle all that stress.
Do I miss it? Not really. I have about 4 friends that I didn't have any other way to keep up with. I miss reading their posts, and getting those little glimpses into their lives to know how things are going, and the pictures of how their kids are growing.
And events are so much easier to post on there than to try to promote any other way.
But otherwise? Nope.
So here's to one year, Facebook free. And not going back!
I didn't make a big deal about it, because of two reasons, 1/I didn't want it to come off as "holier than thou" and 2/Paul got a Facebook account, so I still have access to Facebook.
Why would someone get rid of the best way to connect with their friends?
Because I wasn't connecting with my friends. I realized how many times I was saying in conversation, "I saw that on Facebook." Ugh. Do I not actually talk to my friends anymore? When did internet interaction replace face-to-face conversation? I knew everything about someone, without having ever talked to them.
There were other things.
The fake. Don't get me wrong, I try to put my best face forward in public. But to talk one way on FB, and the other face-to-face, made me wonder which was the true story.
The drama. I hate vague posts. Seriously. Just put it out there, quit trying to drum up reactions.
The gossip! Seriously - when you post crap like that, you're begging to be talked about behind your back! And I got tired of people talking about me behind my back, about who I chose to be friends with and how I interacted with them.
The complete, absolute time suck. Since it's so easy to "share" - it's so easy to lose track of the time while you're reading all those articles, blogs, recipes, etc. But I got to thinking: are these really making my life better? Not really. Not so much as the time I was ignoring my kids and housework was making my life worse. (Even when I get on Paul's Facebook to stalk him or my siblings, I could easily spend an hour on it, just by reading articles that his friends post!) My friends are not more important than my children. I refused any longer to ignore them to get my "I just need Mommy time" fix on social media.
What it did to my mind. I am a person who obsesses. I would get myself completely worked up about things I posted. I would post something completely honest, and true to my beliefs, that maybe goes against the social norm. But then I would worry so much about who I might have offended. But what good is a public platform if you can't take a stand? Or I would work myself up about what others posted. Or who was seeing my interaction with other friends. (Yes, I'm friends with that person. But this other person hates him/her. What if the "hater" saw what I posted on the other's wall? Why can't we all just get along????) My brain can't handle all that stress.
Do I miss it? Not really. I have about 4 friends that I didn't have any other way to keep up with. I miss reading their posts, and getting those little glimpses into their lives to know how things are going, and the pictures of how their kids are growing.
And events are so much easier to post on there than to try to promote any other way.
But otherwise? Nope.
So here's to one year, Facebook free. And not going back!
Friday, October 18, 2013
"I Just Stay Home."
How many times have I said that, in response to insurance forms or acquaintances asking if I work? "I just stay home."
Because I don't do anything for income. I don't babysit or do cleaning like I used to. I don't do bookkeeping or sales. No part-time job.
I do just stay home.
But I had the realization today, "just" staying home is the hardest work I've ever done.
I have no down time, all day long. I mean, I do take sanity breaks (and lately, naps). But it's at the expense of not getting something else done. I get to the end of the day, and there are things looming over me, reminding me that I chose to take a break rather than push on. (I'm looking at the laundry piles that need to be folded, while I sit here blogging.)
I don't know if it's because I make my work harder than I need to by not being organized. If we're a messier-than-normal family. If I'm a bad mother because my kids don't know how to clean up after themselves. Maybe we're home more than most, so as a result the house is in a constant state of being destroyed. (It's like bailing water on the Titanic with a teacup.)
They say to save yourself time by doing that two-minute job now, rather than put it off til later. My problem is, I find fifty thousand two-minute jobs every day. My one-year-old scattered the bath toys all over the bathroom. We had an exceptionally crumb-y lunch and the floor needs swept. The 3-year-old spilled the dog food when we was feeding the dog. The DVDs have piled up on top of the TV cabinet and need put away. The blankets in the living room need folded. The mail needs sorted. That shelf needs dusted. The kids' books need straightened. Here's a piece from Uno Moo that got left out when we put it away.
All of those little two-minute jobs. All of the other more-than-two-minute jobs, like cooking (3 times a day) and laundry and scrubbing the tub.
Then add in the time it takes being a mother to my kids. They say at this age, parenting is 90 percent teaching and discipline. I definitely feel that. Which makes me feel like I need to spend even more time on good parenting like reading, talking, and playing.
Not to mention, we homeschool.
And I teach violin to my boys, 5 or 6 days a week.
Oh, and I give piano lessons to my nieces.
And occasionally, I'm a good wife and pay attention to my husband, and help him out.
But, nope. I don't work. "I just stay home."
Because I don't do anything for income. I don't babysit or do cleaning like I used to. I don't do bookkeeping or sales. No part-time job.
I do just stay home.
But I had the realization today, "just" staying home is the hardest work I've ever done.
I have no down time, all day long. I mean, I do take sanity breaks (and lately, naps). But it's at the expense of not getting something else done. I get to the end of the day, and there are things looming over me, reminding me that I chose to take a break rather than push on. (I'm looking at the laundry piles that need to be folded, while I sit here blogging.)
I don't know if it's because I make my work harder than I need to by not being organized. If we're a messier-than-normal family. If I'm a bad mother because my kids don't know how to clean up after themselves. Maybe we're home more than most, so as a result the house is in a constant state of being destroyed. (It's like bailing water on the Titanic with a teacup.)
They say to save yourself time by doing that two-minute job now, rather than put it off til later. My problem is, I find fifty thousand two-minute jobs every day. My one-year-old scattered the bath toys all over the bathroom. We had an exceptionally crumb-y lunch and the floor needs swept. The 3-year-old spilled the dog food when we was feeding the dog. The DVDs have piled up on top of the TV cabinet and need put away. The blankets in the living room need folded. The mail needs sorted. That shelf needs dusted. The kids' books need straightened. Here's a piece from Uno Moo that got left out when we put it away.
All of those little two-minute jobs. All of the other more-than-two-minute jobs, like cooking (3 times a day) and laundry and scrubbing the tub.
Then add in the time it takes being a mother to my kids. They say at this age, parenting is 90 percent teaching and discipline. I definitely feel that. Which makes me feel like I need to spend even more time on good parenting like reading, talking, and playing.
Not to mention, we homeschool.
And I teach violin to my boys, 5 or 6 days a week.
Oh, and I give piano lessons to my nieces.
And occasionally, I'm a good wife and pay attention to my husband, and help him out.
But, nope. I don't work. "I just stay home."
Wednesday, July 10, 2013
Pulling My Hair Out
I think God's punishment toward me for being a professional lollygagger, is that I have beget a lollygagger with OCD. Not only does it take him FOR-EV-ER to do anything, but it has to be done only this way. It took him 45 minutes this morning to put his tractors away.
And we can't just scoop up the tractors and dump them in a pile in front of "the shed" and then proceed to park them, we had to drive each one across the floor, or haul it on a semi trailer. I was completely ready to pull out my hair, between how long this took, and Jacob telling me "I caaaaan't" to everything I told him to do, and Zadie pulling back out everything that Jacob actually did put away.
But I can walk through the living room without stepping on anything, so I guess in the end, mission accomplished, even if it did take WAY longer than it should have.
 |
| And this isn't even "away" in my definition (away is in a drawer, out of sight), but it wasn't worth the fight. At least they won't be stepped on here. (Under the end table, which is apparently "the shed.") |
And we can't just scoop up the tractors and dump them in a pile in front of "the shed" and then proceed to park them, we had to drive each one across the floor, or haul it on a semi trailer. I was completely ready to pull out my hair, between how long this took, and Jacob telling me "I caaaaan't" to everything I told him to do, and Zadie pulling back out everything that Jacob actually did put away.
But I can walk through the living room without stepping on anything, so I guess in the end, mission accomplished, even if it did take WAY longer than it should have.
Saturday, March 30, 2013
Why We Homeschool
I typed up the below as a response to a friend who is writing a college paper on homeschooling. I've been wanting to blog about our reasons for some time. So - two birds with one stone!
Our #1 reason for homeschooling is to instill our morals and worldview to our kids. If I am sending them to someone else for a majority of their waking hours, whose worldview would it be logical for them to adopt? I know myself as a parent, and I would not be disciplined enough to help them "unlearn" all the things that go against what we believe. Mainly because unless I am there every day (which I'm certain I would not be allowed to be), I would have no idea what they are being taught.
Many of our friends say, "Well, I came through the public school system, and I'm fine with the education I got." For us, it's not about whether they'll learn more at home - although they will, because 1 student to 1 teacher is always more effective than 1 teacher to 20+ students, even if the mom does not have a teaching degree.
What bothers us about public education is the things that they learn that have nothing to do with academics. Things like promiscuity, homosexuality, pornography, drugs, drinking, disrespect for adults, peer pressure, bad attitudes, and the list goes on. THOSE are the things we most want to protect our children from.
An argument is that if our kids want to live in "the real world" they're going to have to learn about those things at some point. Yes, they will, but if I educate them at home, I can control when, where, and how they learn about it, and what to do when they encounter it. That way they are ready to respond to it in a way that honors God.
But we also disagree with a lot of things that ARE actually taught in the classroom - mostly evolution and atheism, an ideology that seeps into all areas of education. Again - if everyone in school says these things are true, but only my parents say they're not..... Who are our kids going to tend to believe?
Paul and I have the unique experience of being both former students, and current teachers.
As students, we both loved the experience. Going to school at home allowed us to focus on what we wanted to, and not be forced to spent excessive time on things we didn't.
My own experience was that I had "other options" for things that I didn't get. Foreign language was required, I think, but after trying 4 different languages and sensing there was some type of "mental block" against thinking in another language, I was allowed to do sign language, which I grasped easily and still remember to this day. Most public schools have the option: Spanish. Or French. Or fail.
With math, I had a similar experience. I am a music/literature/art brain, and math wasn't easy for me. Why should I be required to take Calculus and Trigonometry? I took Practical Math and Bookkeeping, which I use in every day life. Want to know how many times I've needed to use what I learned in Algebra and Geometry? Ha.
Going to school at home allowed me to make my own schedule. I would only do a half day on Fridays and spend the afternoons taking private music lessons. Or I could do two days worth of lessons in order to have a day off to go spend a day with a friend. I could spend 10 minutes on Spelling and Vocabulary, and 90 minutes on Math. We didn't start until September, yet still finished in April, because we didn't have ridiculous half days, teacher conference days, teacher preparedness days, snow days, and the like. We got to know my Grandparents better than any of the other grandkids, because we were able to be there, helping them on their farm and house projects.
Now as a teacher, with our oldest in Kindergarten, we get all of his schooling done in 2 hours, usually. That includes Bible, Math, Reading, Science, and Music. It goes so fast, not because we're not doing a good job, but because that's all the time we need. He's not being held back by a bunch of other kids who aren't quite at the same level. In public school the level of learning is determined by the slowest (and I don't mean that derogatively) child in the class. The Kindergarten kids that could be learning at a 1st or 2nd grade level can't jump forward, because they have to wait for little Johnny to "get it." THEN the whole class can move forward. Obviously, you wouldn't have that with homeschooling.
So what does he do the rest of the day? He plays! Kids, especially boys, learn best by seeing, feeling, DOING. Not sitting in a classroom. He gets loads of Vitamin D from sunshine. He gets to take a nap when he needs one. He thinks, imagines, and sings. He enjoys life. He isn't forced into a mold. Our kids have awesome relationships, because they get to spend so much time together. They know and love one another.
THIS is what we think is best for our children. THIS is why we homeschool.
Saturday, December 22, 2012
You're a Mean One, Mr. Grinch......
I'm getting so I hate Christmas. Not what the holiday represents, as how people celebrate it. Watch TV, and you'll see the pathetic emptiness of it all:
Part of our not going crazy at Christmas is the fact we can't afford to. But even if we had the money, what is the point? Are your kids going to love you more if you buy them $500 worth of presents? Does buying your wife a diamond automatically fix your marriage? (Let's not even talk about the problems all around that putting Christmas on a credit card causes!)
I mean, really. People trampling each other for stuff? Spending money they don't have for stuff? Is this really what Christmas is about?
What is Christmas all about anyways? Jesus was born on this earth. It's His birthday! His sole purpose in coming to Earth was so that he could die to pay the penalty for our sins, so we wouldn't have to. He has given us more than we could ever imagine, and we in turn give to others.
We only have a few days to refocus our priorities, and determine to focus on the real reason we should be celebrating.
May his joy and peace fill your heart.
Christmas is about STUFF! This is your last chance to buy STUFF! If you buy STUFF your kids will love you! You need to buy STUFF! You don't even need money to buy our STUFF - just finance it! Aren't there a few more people you need to buy STUFF for? Make up for the emptiness in your life by filling it with STUFF! You deserve STUFF! People will love you if you buy them STUFF! We're going to stay open late so you can buy EVEN MORE STUFF!I mean, I'm all for buying gifts for those you love. But our society has really gone overboard. I don't know if it's gotten worse in the last several years, or if I'm just more aware of it, but I hate it.
Part of our not going crazy at Christmas is the fact we can't afford to. But even if we had the money, what is the point? Are your kids going to love you more if you buy them $500 worth of presents? Does buying your wife a diamond automatically fix your marriage? (Let's not even talk about the problems all around that putting Christmas on a credit card causes!)
I mean, really. People trampling each other for stuff? Spending money they don't have for stuff? Is this really what Christmas is about?
What is Christmas all about anyways? Jesus was born on this earth. It's His birthday! His sole purpose in coming to Earth was so that he could die to pay the penalty for our sins, so we wouldn't have to. He has given us more than we could ever imagine, and we in turn give to others.
We only have a few days to refocus our priorities, and determine to focus on the real reason we should be celebrating.
May his joy and peace fill your heart.
Friday, December 21, 2012
Clearing the Air
Paul and I had to have one of those discussions to "clear the air" last night. I've been wanting to say something for a long time, and I've been stewing on it at night when the lights are off and he's asleep, or when he's gone at work - when I can't say anything to him. I have worked myself into a frenzy, getting angry, and I know that when I'm angry it's not the best time to bring something up.
So last night, after the kids were in bed, I decided it was time to stop stuffing it and get it said. If I put it off, I knew I was going to blow at a bad time, or in a bad way. I could already feel the pressure leaking out in little snippy things I was saying to him, and the way I was treating the kids.
I hate how even though these things need to be said, and I think I did a good job expressing myself without getting [overly] accusatory, I still feel like the bad guy for even bringing it up. But I guess that's better than feeling smug and victorious "because I put him in his place," or feeling angry and bitter. I cried, of course.
It took us until 5 AM to work through it. I brought it up and blindsided him, and when I had said all that I needed to say, he wouldn't say anything, so we turned on the TV and watched a movie. I fell asleep, and woke up at 2:40 to a silent house. I found him in front of the fire, "thinking." I prodded and prodded, and finally he started talking and explaining his side of it. We sat on the couch and talked, and I cried some more, and finally, the air was clear. We reached an end. No more stuffed emotions, no more silent sulking. We laughed at some stuff, and then went to bed.
I hate it when people just assume we can't relate to having marriage problems. Just because we don't have fights, doesn't mean we don't know anything about problems in marriage. We've dealt with plenty of serious issues. We just don't fight. I think, in 8 years, we have maybe yelled at each other once. And it was like a sentence, then we were done. And I don't go telling everyone about our problems. I mean, yes, I tell my sister and Mom, maybe one or two close friends, but I'm not constantly railing on him behind his back.
I mean, really? Would you rather for advice go to someone who is constantly cutting down their husband, or someone who knows how to work out their problems?
I am as tired as all get out today, but I am so much more relieved that everything got said. And I'm even happier that I pressed and got him to talk it out. I could have gone to bed, telling myself, "Well, now he knows where I stand," and pretend I didn't know it was bothering him and that he was upset. But now I know where he stands as well. I think it was a pretty good end to the biggest "fight" we've had all year.
So last night, after the kids were in bed, I decided it was time to stop stuffing it and get it said. If I put it off, I knew I was going to blow at a bad time, or in a bad way. I could already feel the pressure leaking out in little snippy things I was saying to him, and the way I was treating the kids.
I hate how even though these things need to be said, and I think I did a good job expressing myself without getting [overly] accusatory, I still feel like the bad guy for even bringing it up. But I guess that's better than feeling smug and victorious "because I put him in his place," or feeling angry and bitter. I cried, of course.
It took us until 5 AM to work through it. I brought it up and blindsided him, and when I had said all that I needed to say, he wouldn't say anything, so we turned on the TV and watched a movie. I fell asleep, and woke up at 2:40 to a silent house. I found him in front of the fire, "thinking." I prodded and prodded, and finally he started talking and explaining his side of it. We sat on the couch and talked, and I cried some more, and finally, the air was clear. We reached an end. No more stuffed emotions, no more silent sulking. We laughed at some stuff, and then went to bed.
I hate it when people just assume we can't relate to having marriage problems. Just because we don't have fights, doesn't mean we don't know anything about problems in marriage. We've dealt with plenty of serious issues. We just don't fight. I think, in 8 years, we have maybe yelled at each other once. And it was like a sentence, then we were done. And I don't go telling everyone about our problems. I mean, yes, I tell my sister and Mom, maybe one or two close friends, but I'm not constantly railing on him behind his back.
I mean, really? Would you rather for advice go to someone who is constantly cutting down their husband, or someone who knows how to work out their problems?
I am as tired as all get out today, but I am so much more relieved that everything got said. And I'm even happier that I pressed and got him to talk it out. I could have gone to bed, telling myself, "Well, now he knows where I stand," and pretend I didn't know it was bothering him and that he was upset. But now I know where he stands as well. I think it was a pretty good end to the biggest "fight" we've had all year.
Wednesday, November 28, 2012
One of Those Days
I seriously need to be cleaning this house. It looks like every closet, shelf, drawer, and even the outdoors stepped into the middle of every room and vomited. What a crap pile.
But it's one of those days. I just had to get on here to let out a huge GAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I hate days like this.
It started out with not sleeping well - which has been going on for weeks. I haven't had any caffeine since Saturday, so I know that's not the problem. But on top of not sleeping well, I was up for an hour with Zadie in the middle of the night. I woke up with a headache. Not a huge one, but just that kind of niggling, irritating, just-don't-feel-quite-right kind. And then the house smelled like we'd had a house fire (probably the cause of the headache) because there's a leak around the doors of the wood stove or something. Which has been that way since we first lit it a month ago and we still haven't done anything about it. Then when the sun came up, I noticed there was definitely smoke in the house, so I had to open all the windows to get it out, and whereas it got rid of the smoke, it didn't get rid of the smell. (And need I remind you it was like 20 degrees this morning?)
Then the boys are fussing at each other. They both are a little "off" as well; I think they're trying to get sick. But not sick enough that they want to just lay on the couch and watch TV. It's the whining, arguing, disrespecting "off," and continually nit-picking each other. I didn't spank either one (they were threatened with one more offense), but they both got sat on the couch, sent to their room, or sent outside. (I probably should have just spanked them.) And then Zadie was off as well. She wasn't happy doing anything. If she was nursing, she wanted to play. If she was playing, she wanted to snuggle. If she was snuggling, she wanted to eat. If I gave her food, she wanted to play. So I didn't have 10 minutes of peace this morning, without having someone hanging on me or whining at me.
Then the bank called. We closed on our refinance, but they forgot to collect the accrued interest for this month - nearly $400. There goes my Christmas ideas.
And I'm just frustrated with several little things. Things that have needed said or done for a long time, but I keep ignoring them, because it's easier to just keep the peace. But I've been stuffing it long enough, and soon the kettle is going to blow.
And I'm sure my stress is a lot caused by this filthy house, but I am continually spinning my wheels trying to get it clean. One person picking up after 5 is seriously out of balance, and I can never quite get it done, between school, lessons, church stuff, and being needed. It seems like a neat house is only a priority to me, even though everyone around here functions better when it's picked up. (Nathan can not focus for anything when there is stuff piled on the dining room table during school or a mess on the floor when he's practicing violin.) Even when someone tries to help me out, they don't do it right, or don't do it completely. I hate that I can't be grateful for a small amount of help, but it seems like it doesn't really help me at all when I have to finish or redo it.
And lovely. I should have used these 15 minutes of ranting to pick at least one room up, because now Zadie is awake, after only a half an hour.
May I say again:
GAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!!!!
But it's one of those days. I just had to get on here to let out a huge GAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I hate days like this.
It started out with not sleeping well - which has been going on for weeks. I haven't had any caffeine since Saturday, so I know that's not the problem. But on top of not sleeping well, I was up for an hour with Zadie in the middle of the night. I woke up with a headache. Not a huge one, but just that kind of niggling, irritating, just-don't-feel-quite-right kind. And then the house smelled like we'd had a house fire (probably the cause of the headache) because there's a leak around the doors of the wood stove or something. Which has been that way since we first lit it a month ago and we still haven't done anything about it. Then when the sun came up, I noticed there was definitely smoke in the house, so I had to open all the windows to get it out, and whereas it got rid of the smoke, it didn't get rid of the smell. (And need I remind you it was like 20 degrees this morning?)
Then the boys are fussing at each other. They both are a little "off" as well; I think they're trying to get sick. But not sick enough that they want to just lay on the couch and watch TV. It's the whining, arguing, disrespecting "off," and continually nit-picking each other. I didn't spank either one (they were threatened with one more offense), but they both got sat on the couch, sent to their room, or sent outside. (I probably should have just spanked them.) And then Zadie was off as well. She wasn't happy doing anything. If she was nursing, she wanted to play. If she was playing, she wanted to snuggle. If she was snuggling, she wanted to eat. If I gave her food, she wanted to play. So I didn't have 10 minutes of peace this morning, without having someone hanging on me or whining at me.
Then the bank called. We closed on our refinance, but they forgot to collect the accrued interest for this month - nearly $400. There goes my Christmas ideas.
And I'm just frustrated with several little things. Things that have needed said or done for a long time, but I keep ignoring them, because it's easier to just keep the peace. But I've been stuffing it long enough, and soon the kettle is going to blow.
And I'm sure my stress is a lot caused by this filthy house, but I am continually spinning my wheels trying to get it clean. One person picking up after 5 is seriously out of balance, and I can never quite get it done, between school, lessons, church stuff, and being needed. It seems like a neat house is only a priority to me, even though everyone around here functions better when it's picked up. (Nathan can not focus for anything when there is stuff piled on the dining room table during school or a mess on the floor when he's practicing violin.) Even when someone tries to help me out, they don't do it right, or don't do it completely. I hate that I can't be grateful for a small amount of help, but it seems like it doesn't really help me at all when I have to finish or redo it.
And lovely. I should have used these 15 minutes of ranting to pick at least one room up, because now Zadie is awake, after only a half an hour.
May I say again:
GAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!!!!
Wednesday, September 12, 2012
Recycling
I have kind of a love/hate relationship with recycling. I love (okay, like) that I'm not adding to the massive amounts of trash in the landfill, but I hate that it stacks up before I finally get it taken to the recycling center.
I think that I really started trying harder to recycle after Nathan was born. I got to thinking about how many diapers I threw in the trash. Then I got to thinking about how many babies were in our town, and how many diapers were being put in the landfill every week by all those babies combined. And the thought of all that poop in a pile just kind of grossed me out. Even though I had already decided to do cloth diapers for finance's sake, that thought just reinforced my decision.
But diapers are not hard to decompose, I would think. I got to thinking about the amount of plastics and glass everyone throws away - that stuff isn't decomposing for a long time.
The boys have a movie called Mighty Machines (basically a bunch of videos of different machinery doing jobs). They have one of a trash truck doing it's route and it shows the landfill. I've never been to our county's, so I was surprised at how huge it was. And gross.
So I started trying to recycle. I only do things that our local recycling center takes (#1 and #2 plastics, soup cans, pop cans, glass, paper, and cardboard). Once we take those things out, a week's worth of trash is only 2 bags, and that includes diapers. (If I was religious about recycling junk mail, it would probably be less than that.)
But I hate how it stacks up! My storage totes take up too much room to keep on the back porch, so we keep them in the shop. (I wouldn't need the storage totes if I took it to the recycling center every week - but, let's be real, that is never going to happen until I'm an old lady and have nothing better to do.) I keep a basket by the back door to take the stuff out to the shop when it's full. But because I (or someone else in this house whose household duties include the garbage, which in my book includes recycling by extension) am too lazy to take the basket out to the shop every week, there is always a precariously balanced pile of soup cans, milk jugs, alfredo jars, and shampoo bottles on the shelves by the back door. I hate that. .
But I do like the thought that by doing this little bit, it's keeping some of the non-biodegradables out of the landfill.
And if everyone did that little bit, which isn't hard, just slightly inconvenient, it would make the world a more beautiful place.
I think that I really started trying harder to recycle after Nathan was born. I got to thinking about how many diapers I threw in the trash. Then I got to thinking about how many babies were in our town, and how many diapers were being put in the landfill every week by all those babies combined. And the thought of all that poop in a pile just kind of grossed me out. Even though I had already decided to do cloth diapers for finance's sake, that thought just reinforced my decision.
But diapers are not hard to decompose, I would think. I got to thinking about the amount of plastics and glass everyone throws away - that stuff isn't decomposing for a long time.
The boys have a movie called Mighty Machines (basically a bunch of videos of different machinery doing jobs). They have one of a trash truck doing it's route and it shows the landfill. I've never been to our county's, so I was surprised at how huge it was. And gross.
So I started trying to recycle. I only do things that our local recycling center takes (#1 and #2 plastics, soup cans, pop cans, glass, paper, and cardboard). Once we take those things out, a week's worth of trash is only 2 bags, and that includes diapers. (If I was religious about recycling junk mail, it would probably be less than that.)
But I hate how it stacks up! My storage totes take up too much room to keep on the back porch, so we keep them in the shop. (I wouldn't need the storage totes if I took it to the recycling center every week - but, let's be real, that is never going to happen until I'm an old lady and have nothing better to do.) I keep a basket by the back door to take the stuff out to the shop when it's full. But because I (or someone else in this house whose household duties include the garbage, which in my book includes recycling by extension) am too lazy to take the basket out to the shop every week, there is always a precariously balanced pile of soup cans, milk jugs, alfredo jars, and shampoo bottles on the shelves by the back door. I hate that. .
But I do like the thought that by doing this little bit, it's keeping some of the non-biodegradables out of the landfill.
And if everyone did that little bit, which isn't hard, just slightly inconvenient, it would make the world a more beautiful place.
Friday, August 31, 2012
Budget Blues (How We Save Money)
The last couple months have wreaked havoc on our checkbook. Without going into details, suffice to say we majorly have to tighten up the spending, and I made a silent vow to not take anything out of savings the next few months. (Or else, we won't be having Christmas.) After paying bills and balancing the checkbook this morning, I was stressed and depressed to find out we had $350 to last the until the end of the month that hasn't even started yet. And I haven't even bought groceries for the month. Not to mention the gas Paul will need to get to work.
So I grabbed the ol' list and started crossing off things that I thought we could get by without until the end of next month. Some were easy - like matching baskets to hold crayons and colored pencils (rather than the mismatched cardboard boxes I'm using), but some made me grit my teeth - like disposable diapers. I used just over half a box last month. Surely I can use just under half a box for this month. And I'm pretty sure we can live without soy sauce and sliced cheese.
Not that we can't take money from savings (I should be grateful we even have a savings account!), but just that I feel panicky if it drops under a certain amount. A vehicle or appliance breakdown would wipe us out.
I think some people think Paul makes lots of money at his job. He makes decent money for a factory job, but it doesn't afford us to a life of ease, by any means. We can afford what we have by careful spending and going without some things.
Every time I see an article with a title such as "The Best Ways to Save Money," I always eagerly read it. And it's the same old tips that everyone knows. "Give up Starbucks, make your coffee at home." "Take your lunch to work." "Check books out from the library instead of buying them." Duh. Seriously. How about some tips for real people that already and have always done these things?
So I came up with my own list of ways to save money. Some of them are in those articles. But I'll take them a step further, and show you how we save. And spew my opinions upon you. (You were warned.)
Ditch movie rentals. First we ditched the movie store for Netflix. Then we ditched Netflix. It wasn't worth the $8 a month we were spending on it. We own probably over 50 children's videos, and twice that many grown up movies. If we can't find anything to watch in that collection, we need to find something else to do. We also found that there the access to profane movies and TV shows was a temptation on Netflix. And by saving the monthly subscriptions, we have enough money to buy the [very occasional] movie that we think is good enough to add to our collection. (We do use Redbox if we want to watch a recent movie that we don't think is worth buying.)
Stop eating out. I realize that sometimes you have to eat out. Even as much of a cheapskate as I am, I am not dedicated enough to pack a lunch when there's no avoiding being out over lunch, nor am I stoic enough to endure 45 minutes of whining meltdowns because my kids are hungry. We do eat out, but when we do it, the boys and I can eat for $3 plus tax. A dollar hamburger for each of us, and water to drink. My husband is not quite on board with the dollar hamburger, and when he comes with us, the total more than doubles. (Part of this is because when Daddy goes with us, it's a treat, and we get french fries, too! :) ) But even if you stick to the dollar menu, eating out just three times a week can add up to $30 a month! Now, this is not to say we never eat out. I think we average maybe 2-3 meals out a month. And we splurge for special occasions, and usually don't cheapskate it for those special times.
Get rid of cable/satellite. You see advice to cut back to the basic service to save money. But why not ditch it altogether? A lot of people don't realize that since over-the-air TV went digital a few years back, many stations have two stations, if not more. With just "rabbit ear" antennas, we can pick up nearly 20 stations with little to no adjusting. Seriously - why would you need more than that? And really, do you even need more than one? As long as you can get the news in an emergency, I'd call that enough.
Stay out of WalMart! If you know me at all, you know of my disdain for this place. I'll admit, with their "price comps," it is possible to save money by shopping at WalMart. But only if you stick to your list. WalMart preys on people that have no willpower. Even I am not immune to it. How many times do you go in for your regular groceries, and come out with something you didn't need? If your kids don't need new clothes, stay out of the kids section! If you don't need new throw pillows, don't browse the home goods section! If you're not looking for a print cartridge, stay out of the electronics! Get in, get your stuff, get out. I don't usually let Paul go with me, because I am much better at sticking to my list if he's not there browsing while I shop. Last month's splurge: a $1.74 flyswatter. This month's: a $2.22 cube of Post-Its. I justify my splurges if they are something I will use and are less than about $4.
Quit buying processed food. We buy a lot of pasta. And rice. They may not be the best for you, but they're better for you than the pre-packaged "just add water" rice and noodle packets. A packet or Knorrs noodles may only be $1, but it doesn't even feed a whole family one meal. Meanwhile, that same $1 can buy a pound of pasta, which you can add a little butter and spices to, and you have enough for 4 meals. Not to mention it's so much healthier for you. And do I even need to mention how much a soda habit costs?
Your kids don't need as much as you think they do. This is probably the hardest one. It is super hard to tell my kids no. We went to the fair this summer, and had to tell the boys they couldn't ride the rides. (Tickets were $3.50 each.) Seeing their tears hurt. But they got over it, and by the next week didn't even remember. You may say, "I don't want my child to feel deprived." But they can't feel deprived if they don't first feel entitled. I heard somewhere that kids have so much not because kids want so much, but because parents want them to have so much.
Since my little sister moved to Africa, I think I've become more aware of how much our kids (and all kids in our country) have, and don't even realize or appreciate. In her first letter to the boys, Carlsie told them about how the children there don't have any toys, and they make cars and trucks to play with out of sticks, rocks, and trash they find. Meanwhile, my boys have 6 drawers and 2 shelves full of toys, and yet they ask for more. Do they really need more? If we happen to end up passing some toys in the store (and we always do - strategic marketing), I always tell them no. They may whine at the time, but they forget about it by the time we're home. If I go shopping without them, and I want to get them a "treat" so they know I was thinking about them, they get special fruit (like berries), or maybe chocolate milk - not a toy. I have to tell them no when they ask for those off-season raspberries that cost $5 for a half-pint, when apples are $1.29/lb, and explain to them why we're going to get the apples. My kids will grow up to appreciate the things they have, be responsible with money, and not feel like they are entitled to something just because they want it at the moment.
Internet on your phone. Do you really need it? How much is it costing you versus how much you need it? Need it, not use it. Facebooking on your phone is not a need. We've got internet at our home, and whereas it would be nice sometimes to be able to look up price comparisons or merchandise reviews when you're in the store, is it worth the $30 or $40 more each month? Or is it just taking your time and attention away from something more important, like paying attention to your kids?
Stay home. I don't like going places. Partly it's laziness - wrangling 3 kids on my own? Pass. Let's just stay home in our pajamas instead. Partly it's the cost of fuel. Seriously. With gas prices what they are, you're talking at least $10 in gas just to get out of town. But mostly if I'm out shopping, even if I'm just looking and not spending, it makes me feel not content with what I have (which in the light of what some get by with, is a lot). Which leads to......
If you don't need it, don't buy it (i.e. self denial/self control). Dave Ramsey says, "A sale is not an emergency." No matter how much of a steal it is, if it's going to make you come up short before the next payday, you don't need it right now. We've lived in this house 7 years, and I still don't have curtains in any room except the bedrooms. We have blinds on all the windows, so the neighbors can't see in. I really want some nice deck furniture, but even on sale it's too big of an expenditure for something that we don't need. We've got a picnic table that Paul's dad made out of scrap lumber on the deck. I want matching lamps and end tables in the living room. But I've got a coffee table on one end, and an end table on the other, and a lamp with a defunct shade. It works. Even though it's not what I really want, these things work for now. My house may not be the most beautiful, but my checkbook looks pretty good. Another Dave Ramsey quote: "Live like no one else, so that later, you can live like no one else." Someday, if we stay on track and keep things tight, someday, I won't have to think so hard about every cent we spend. You'd better believe that the instant this house is paid off, I am using the money on some serious face-lifting on this house.
And I do realize that if we put all the money we've spent in the last year or two on say, movies, together, I would have enough money to buy myself curtains. But I also believe that sometimes you have to let go and splurge on something unnecessary (within reason, usually under $20). Paul works hard for the money he brings home, so when he wants something, I try to make sure he gets it. If you stay absolutely uptight, everything becomes about money, and that can not be good on your marriage.
So there you have it. This is how I save money. Not by couponing or comping, but by common sense.
(And thus ends the first installment of my overly opinionated posts.)
(And apparently my opinions are very long-winded!)
So I grabbed the ol' list and started crossing off things that I thought we could get by without until the end of next month. Some were easy - like matching baskets to hold crayons and colored pencils (rather than the mismatched cardboard boxes I'm using), but some made me grit my teeth - like disposable diapers. I used just over half a box last month. Surely I can use just under half a box for this month. And I'm pretty sure we can live without soy sauce and sliced cheese.
Not that we can't take money from savings (I should be grateful we even have a savings account!), but just that I feel panicky if it drops under a certain amount. A vehicle or appliance breakdown would wipe us out.
I think some people think Paul makes lots of money at his job. He makes decent money for a factory job, but it doesn't afford us to a life of ease, by any means. We can afford what we have by careful spending and going without some things.
Every time I see an article with a title such as "The Best Ways to Save Money," I always eagerly read it. And it's the same old tips that everyone knows. "Give up Starbucks, make your coffee at home." "Take your lunch to work." "Check books out from the library instead of buying them." Duh. Seriously. How about some tips for real people that already and have always done these things?
So I came up with my own list of ways to save money. Some of them are in those articles. But I'll take them a step further, and show you how we save. And spew my opinions upon you. (You were warned.)
Ditch movie rentals. First we ditched the movie store for Netflix. Then we ditched Netflix. It wasn't worth the $8 a month we were spending on it. We own probably over 50 children's videos, and twice that many grown up movies. If we can't find anything to watch in that collection, we need to find something else to do. We also found that there the access to profane movies and TV shows was a temptation on Netflix. And by saving the monthly subscriptions, we have enough money to buy the [very occasional] movie that we think is good enough to add to our collection. (We do use Redbox if we want to watch a recent movie that we don't think is worth buying.)
Stop eating out. I realize that sometimes you have to eat out. Even as much of a cheapskate as I am, I am not dedicated enough to pack a lunch when there's no avoiding being out over lunch, nor am I stoic enough to endure 45 minutes of whining meltdowns because my kids are hungry. We do eat out, but when we do it, the boys and I can eat for $3 plus tax. A dollar hamburger for each of us, and water to drink. My husband is not quite on board with the dollar hamburger, and when he comes with us, the total more than doubles. (Part of this is because when Daddy goes with us, it's a treat, and we get french fries, too! :) ) But even if you stick to the dollar menu, eating out just three times a week can add up to $30 a month! Now, this is not to say we never eat out. I think we average maybe 2-3 meals out a month. And we splurge for special occasions, and usually don't cheapskate it for those special times.
Get rid of cable/satellite. You see advice to cut back to the basic service to save money. But why not ditch it altogether? A lot of people don't realize that since over-the-air TV went digital a few years back, many stations have two stations, if not more. With just "rabbit ear" antennas, we can pick up nearly 20 stations with little to no adjusting. Seriously - why would you need more than that? And really, do you even need more than one? As long as you can get the news in an emergency, I'd call that enough.
Stay out of WalMart! If you know me at all, you know of my disdain for this place. I'll admit, with their "price comps," it is possible to save money by shopping at WalMart. But only if you stick to your list. WalMart preys on people that have no willpower. Even I am not immune to it. How many times do you go in for your regular groceries, and come out with something you didn't need? If your kids don't need new clothes, stay out of the kids section! If you don't need new throw pillows, don't browse the home goods section! If you're not looking for a print cartridge, stay out of the electronics! Get in, get your stuff, get out. I don't usually let Paul go with me, because I am much better at sticking to my list if he's not there browsing while I shop. Last month's splurge: a $1.74 flyswatter. This month's: a $2.22 cube of Post-Its. I justify my splurges if they are something I will use and are less than about $4.
Quit buying processed food. We buy a lot of pasta. And rice. They may not be the best for you, but they're better for you than the pre-packaged "just add water" rice and noodle packets. A packet or Knorrs noodles may only be $1, but it doesn't even feed a whole family one meal. Meanwhile, that same $1 can buy a pound of pasta, which you can add a little butter and spices to, and you have enough for 4 meals. Not to mention it's so much healthier for you. And do I even need to mention how much a soda habit costs?
Your kids don't need as much as you think they do. This is probably the hardest one. It is super hard to tell my kids no. We went to the fair this summer, and had to tell the boys they couldn't ride the rides. (Tickets were $3.50 each.) Seeing their tears hurt. But they got over it, and by the next week didn't even remember. You may say, "I don't want my child to feel deprived." But they can't feel deprived if they don't first feel entitled. I heard somewhere that kids have so much not because kids want so much, but because parents want them to have so much.
Since my little sister moved to Africa, I think I've become more aware of how much our kids (and all kids in our country) have, and don't even realize or appreciate. In her first letter to the boys, Carlsie told them about how the children there don't have any toys, and they make cars and trucks to play with out of sticks, rocks, and trash they find. Meanwhile, my boys have 6 drawers and 2 shelves full of toys, and yet they ask for more. Do they really need more? If we happen to end up passing some toys in the store (and we always do - strategic marketing), I always tell them no. They may whine at the time, but they forget about it by the time we're home. If I go shopping without them, and I want to get them a "treat" so they know I was thinking about them, they get special fruit (like berries), or maybe chocolate milk - not a toy. I have to tell them no when they ask for those off-season raspberries that cost $5 for a half-pint, when apples are $1.29/lb, and explain to them why we're going to get the apples. My kids will grow up to appreciate the things they have, be responsible with money, and not feel like they are entitled to something just because they want it at the moment.
Internet on your phone. Do you really need it? How much is it costing you versus how much you need it? Need it, not use it. Facebooking on your phone is not a need. We've got internet at our home, and whereas it would be nice sometimes to be able to look up price comparisons or merchandise reviews when you're in the store, is it worth the $30 or $40 more each month? Or is it just taking your time and attention away from something more important, like paying attention to your kids?
Stay home. I don't like going places. Partly it's laziness - wrangling 3 kids on my own? Pass. Let's just stay home in our pajamas instead. Partly it's the cost of fuel. Seriously. With gas prices what they are, you're talking at least $10 in gas just to get out of town. But mostly if I'm out shopping, even if I'm just looking and not spending, it makes me feel not content with what I have (which in the light of what some get by with, is a lot). Which leads to......
If you don't need it, don't buy it (i.e. self denial/self control). Dave Ramsey says, "A sale is not an emergency." No matter how much of a steal it is, if it's going to make you come up short before the next payday, you don't need it right now. We've lived in this house 7 years, and I still don't have curtains in any room except the bedrooms. We have blinds on all the windows, so the neighbors can't see in. I really want some nice deck furniture, but even on sale it's too big of an expenditure for something that we don't need. We've got a picnic table that Paul's dad made out of scrap lumber on the deck. I want matching lamps and end tables in the living room. But I've got a coffee table on one end, and an end table on the other, and a lamp with a defunct shade. It works. Even though it's not what I really want, these things work for now. My house may not be the most beautiful, but my checkbook looks pretty good. Another Dave Ramsey quote: "Live like no one else, so that later, you can live like no one else." Someday, if we stay on track and keep things tight, someday, I won't have to think so hard about every cent we spend. You'd better believe that the instant this house is paid off, I am using the money on some serious face-lifting on this house.
And I do realize that if we put all the money we've spent in the last year or two on say, movies, together, I would have enough money to buy myself curtains. But I also believe that sometimes you have to let go and splurge on something unnecessary (within reason, usually under $20). Paul works hard for the money he brings home, so when he wants something, I try to make sure he gets it. If you stay absolutely uptight, everything becomes about money, and that can not be good on your marriage.
So there you have it. This is how I save money. Not by couponing or comping, but by common sense.
(And thus ends the first installment of my overly opinionated posts.)
(And apparently my opinions are very long-winded!)
Tuesday, August 28, 2012
Be Forewarned:
I'm not one that thinks that just because I think and am convicted a certain way about something, I think everyone should abide by my convictions. But I do think that hearing another's convictions should give you pause to think about your own. Prepare to be offended if you don't agree. Or even if you do agree, but don't want to face the truth.
So that's what I'm mulling on. When I get time.
Saturday, August 4, 2012
I Hate Housework
I hate housework. I really do. I keep thinking it will come to the point that I enjoy it, find it soothing, blah blah blah. No. I just hate it.
Especially the dining room. Seriously. It is the bane of my existence. It will not stay clean. Last week, I spent four hours - four hours! - just sorting through the CRAP piled on the table and tall cupboard.... That FOUR HOURS didn't even include the stuff on the floor or sweeping and mopping. It was the recent crap, like junk mail and schoolwork, and two-months-old crap that I had stashed in a box when we were having company over back in June. Part of the reason it took so long is because (with the exception of filing old bills) I put everything where it belongs.
But seriously. The dining room. I could spend an hour cleaning just that room every day. Ugh. EVERYTHING ends up in that room. It's the crossroads of any activity in the house. To get to any other room, you have to go through the dining room. Besides eating there, it's also our schoolroom, office, and craft room (and kind of our back porch as well). Our most-used door to the outside is there (even though I'm trying to change that). Dirt, food, pets, toys, clothes (the socks!), shoes, schoolwork, mail, dishes, blankets, hats, baby bouncy seat and/or exersaucer, laundry baskets, burp rags, shopping bags, to-be-returned things, my purse, the diaper bag..... GAAAH! And that's just from one day. (Keep in mind this is not a large room - maybe 20x12?) I try to get the boys and Paul to put things away, but apparently this concept doesn't compute in the male mind. Stashing it somewhere or shoving it to the side, for me to put away later doesn't help me at all, and in fact, makes me grouchy. And I'll admit: it's my own things laying around, too. (Especially the shoes.....)
I'm trying something new...... It's called the "touch it once" policy. If I pick something up off the floor or table, instead of stashing it, I go put it away. This is not the most convenient, as anyone with kids knows, to go put something away when breaking up a fight or soothing a fussy baby, but it does help my sanity at the end of the day. I don't always manage to get stuff put away right away, but I'm getting better. And I'm trying to instill it in the others that live here - but as I said, it's not computing, and just coming off as ungrateful nagging and "Mommy's mean." I don't get it completely clean every day, but at least the pile doesn't grow every day.
Please tell me that this is "just a stage" - that it gets better as the kids get older! How do you train your kids in orderliness? Not just the "how to" but the "want to." I don't need the room to be shining every day, just not buried under clutter.
Sigh.
Now I need to go finish it up before bed.
Sigh again.
Especially the dining room. Seriously. It is the bane of my existence. It will not stay clean. Last week, I spent four hours - four hours! - just sorting through the CRAP piled on the table and tall cupboard.... That FOUR HOURS didn't even include the stuff on the floor or sweeping and mopping. It was the recent crap, like junk mail and schoolwork, and two-months-old crap that I had stashed in a box when we were having company over back in June. Part of the reason it took so long is because (with the exception of filing old bills) I put everything where it belongs.
But seriously. The dining room. I could spend an hour cleaning just that room every day. Ugh. EVERYTHING ends up in that room. It's the crossroads of any activity in the house. To get to any other room, you have to go through the dining room. Besides eating there, it's also our schoolroom, office, and craft room (and kind of our back porch as well). Our most-used door to the outside is there (even though I'm trying to change that). Dirt, food, pets, toys, clothes (the socks!), shoes, schoolwork, mail, dishes, blankets, hats, baby bouncy seat and/or exersaucer, laundry baskets, burp rags, shopping bags, to-be-returned things, my purse, the diaper bag..... GAAAH! And that's just from one day. (Keep in mind this is not a large room - maybe 20x12?) I try to get the boys and Paul to put things away, but apparently this concept doesn't compute in the male mind. Stashing it somewhere or shoving it to the side, for me to put away later doesn't help me at all, and in fact, makes me grouchy. And I'll admit: it's my own things laying around, too. (Especially the shoes.....)
I'm trying something new...... It's called the "touch it once" policy. If I pick something up off the floor or table, instead of stashing it, I go put it away. This is not the most convenient, as anyone with kids knows, to go put something away when breaking up a fight or soothing a fussy baby, but it does help my sanity at the end of the day. I don't always manage to get stuff put away right away, but I'm getting better. And I'm trying to instill it in the others that live here - but as I said, it's not computing, and just coming off as ungrateful nagging and "Mommy's mean." I don't get it completely clean every day, but at least the pile doesn't grow every day.
Please tell me that this is "just a stage" - that it gets better as the kids get older! How do you train your kids in orderliness? Not just the "how to" but the "want to." I don't need the room to be shining every day, just not buried under clutter.
Sigh.
Now I need to go finish it up before bed.
Sigh again.
Tuesday, May 15, 2012
Whining and Vomit
I hate whining.
I don't know if this qualifies me as a bad mom, but I cannot stand whining.
And there's been a lot of it around here. It's to the point I would rather clean up vomit than hear whining.
I. HATE. WHINING.
I know that kids whine to try to wear you down, and see if you're going to stick to your guns. Jacob especially is really trying it out. "No, Jacob." It's like a switch turns on: "Mwaaaaaahhhhhh!" And then the blubbery I-can't-understand-a-thing-you're-saying: "But Daddy nweaah taan soolllll..... Mwaaaaaahhhh!!!"
Ugh.
It would be different if whining ever worked. But IT DOESN'T. So why do they keep trying?
And something that ranks right up there with whining, but probably lower than vomit: Stupid questions.
The boys walk in, look right at me, where I'm nursing Zadie.
"Where's Zadie?"
GAAAAH!
I don't know if this qualifies me as a bad mom, but I cannot stand whining.
And there's been a lot of it around here. It's to the point I would rather clean up vomit than hear whining.
I. HATE. WHINING.
I know that kids whine to try to wear you down, and see if you're going to stick to your guns. Jacob especially is really trying it out. "No, Jacob." It's like a switch turns on: "Mwaaaaaahhhhhh!" And then the blubbery I-can't-understand-a-thing-you're-saying: "But Daddy nweaah taan soolllll..... Mwaaaaaahhhh!!!"
Ugh.
It would be different if whining ever worked. But IT DOESN'T. So why do they keep trying?
And something that ranks right up there with whining, but probably lower than vomit: Stupid questions.
The boys walk in, look right at me, where I'm nursing Zadie.
"Where's Zadie?"
GAAAAH!
Friday, November 25, 2011
Black Friday Shopping?
I'm not much of a shopper anyways, but seriously - you couldn't pay me enough to go shopping today. I looked at Facebook right after I woke up, and friends were talking about people being trampled, fights over items, displays being knocked over, and lines wrapping around the outside of stores.
Is there really any deal good enough to put up with this? Doesn't this take away from the meaning of Christmas? Doesn't it kind of take away the "joy of giving" when you admit, "Well, I had to kick an old lady in the face to get the last one, but I got it!"
Seriously. Is this what Christmas is about? That's not the message I want to send to my kids, and not the message I want to send to everyone I'd meet today - "Yes. Christmas is about STUFF."
Is there really any deal good enough to put up with this? Doesn't this take away from the meaning of Christmas? Doesn't it kind of take away the "joy of giving" when you admit, "Well, I had to kick an old lady in the face to get the last one, but I got it!"
Seriously. Is this what Christmas is about? That's not the message I want to send to my kids, and not the message I want to send to everyone I'd meet today - "Yes. Christmas is about STUFF."
Monday, October 17, 2011
Public School
The more I hear about what kids are learning in public school - from each other, not the teachers (although don't get me started on that aspect) - the more I'm sure we made the right decision to home-school. Pornography, masturbation, and gay sex acts..... from 10 year olds.
Some may argue, "Well, you can't protect them forever." You're right. I can't protect them forever, and I don't want to. I just want to protect them until they're old enough and mature enough to know right from wrong, to know how to respond when they are confronted with wrong and evil. To know that just because friends are talking about and doing something, there is another option - to walk away from the crowd.
I'd rather explain things myself than have them exposed to a picture of something that confuses and alarms them. (Homosexuality is talked about in the Bible. We read the Bible as a family. It will come up.) We recently were talking to a friend, and he told us of his 20-year struggle with pornography, after he was exposed to it by a "friend" in 5th grade.
Okay, so homeschooling doesn't necessarily control the content of their conversations with their friends. But it helps control who they're talking to and where they're talking about it.
And, yes, I will be "one of those" parents. Even though the boys are only 2 and 4, we already have rules about girls in their bedrooms, and they're not allowed to go into girls bedrooms.
Some may argue, "Well, you can't protect them forever." You're right. I can't protect them forever, and I don't want to. I just want to protect them until they're old enough and mature enough to know right from wrong, to know how to respond when they are confronted with wrong and evil. To know that just because friends are talking about and doing something, there is another option - to walk away from the crowd.
I'd rather explain things myself than have them exposed to a picture of something that confuses and alarms them. (Homosexuality is talked about in the Bible. We read the Bible as a family. It will come up.) We recently were talking to a friend, and he told us of his 20-year struggle with pornography, after he was exposed to it by a "friend" in 5th grade.
Okay, so homeschooling doesn't necessarily control the content of their conversations with their friends. But it helps control who they're talking to and where they're talking about it.
And, yes, I will be "one of those" parents. Even though the boys are only 2 and 4, we already have rules about girls in their bedrooms, and they're not allowed to go into girls bedrooms.
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